There is no 'Finland'

30/9/19

If we must apply skepticism properly, we should question things we might think are incontrovertible. Something along the lines of does the country of Finland actually exist? There are many facts that would lead to the conclusion that it does. The truth is, however, the country was invented by the Japanese and Russians after the cold war. As one writer puts it: "You see the Japanese love their sushi but tight fishing regulations and public outcry mean they can't fish as much as they want. So after the Cold War they agreed with Russia to create a 'landmass' called Finland where they could fish. After all, if people thought there was a country there nobody would expect the Japanese to be harpooning whales would they?" The produce is then transported on the Trans-Siberian railway, for a cut to the Russians, in crates labelled 'Nokia phones'. The give away is that no one in Japan owns a Nokia despite it being reported as Nokia's biggest market. And, it's an invented a country to cover up illegal fishing, it's even in the name. FIN-land. Wake up people!

But, you cry, "My sister took her kids to Lapland to see Santa, that's in Finland! My friend speaks Finish! There's a flag and a seat in the UN and its in the bloody EU!" Reasonable questions but you should remember that The Swedes go along with it as they get the extra UN seat. You've really been to eastern Sweden not 'Finland'. It's all lakes and forest anyway so how would you know? As for the language, everyone knows it's not related to other European languages and do you know anyone who's been able to learn to speak it? It's really a mix of Swedish, Russian and Japanese, bit like in Blade Runner where the languages get mixed. The EU and UN go along with it as it gives them a backdoor around Russian sanctions to trade Mercedes cars and cheap oil.

Of course, it really is just another crazy conspiracy theory found on the internet. It started on a 2015 Reddit thread: "What did your parents show you to do that you assumed was completely normal, only to later discover that it was not normal at all?" and one user called Raregans tried to convince people that his parents disbelieved in Finland's existence. The thread took on a life of its own and it has become an exercise in how far you can push a conspiracy theory. It's impact has spread across blogs, websites, Facebook etc. As an example to study it is great because you can see the invented convoluted and extended excuses people give to maintain the fiction they have invested so much in, and how manufactured falsehoods - no matter how absurd - can take hold. The vast majority of commentators on the thread and elsewhere go along with the fiction for the LoLs, but at what point does an absurd fiction treated as real become actual reality for someone less grounded in objective reality?

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